There was a lovely response to my post last week on living in London, which makes me think perhaps I should do more about the place. Lots of comments, which you should read there – as well as a trio I should pick out…
1. Yes, it’s true that the Waverley – the glorious Clyde paddle steamer which makes an annual visit to the south of England – isn’t due here another month. An Honest Man – who I’ve known most of my life as my Uncle Bill – posted helpful photographic evidence of the lovely ship steaming past Ayr, on the west of Scotland. The Waverley’s fast, but not fast enough to make it down in those timescales. But I’ll be going for a steam next month.
2. James Cherkoff asked why I advised against buying a house with a basement. Well, James, it’s because mine keeps filling up with water and – given that’s where the boiler lives – that’s a royal pain. And an expensive one, too.
3. Graham Beale adds very very good point – join Tate. He’s right about the members’ club, which has the finest views of any members’ room in the country. I’d also suggest the ICA in the Mall which – aside from having quite the poshest address of any club – has a very nice restaurant and a late bar. [Later: Gah! Thanks Graham! How could I forget the Frontline Club, the journalists' club in Paddington of which I'm a founder member and a great fan? Maybe the very fine members' bar has something to do with my amnesia... decent restaurant there too, open to all.]
There are more nice suggestions from you lovely people at the end of the post – do add more there, rather than here – if inspiration strikes.
It’s the 10th anniversary of my move to London, when I left the homely comforts of my little Edinburgh flat in pursuit of a certain girl, and some work. And we all know how that ended up.
So, to mark ten years working here in the big smoke (if not always living here – we’ll always have Swindon), here are ten top London tips. Feel free, of course, to add your own in the comments, for London or your locale of choice.
1. As soon as you live here, you get to be a Londoner. But remember to be a tourist in your own city. Get on the open-topped buses. Sail down the river (I really want to do this on the Waverley this autumn. Hmm. Maybe this weekend, in fact). Do the Tower, and Buckingham Palace, and the galleries and museums one wet Sunday at a time. And subscribe to my mate Andrew’s brilliant weekly email, and buy his gorgeous guidebook, to find more cool things to do.
2. The Tube’s great, sometimes for several complete days a year. But buses let you see more, if you can suss the masonic ritual that is “getting a ticket”.
3. Oyster (Transport for London’s contactless card system) makes life much easier, even on buses. Some privacy activists will tell you, as they adjust their foil helmets, that they won’t use it because Gordon/George/Boris/Ki-moon/Ken will be able to follow their movements as they touch in, and touch out. Yet they have no trouble telling their cabbie where they’re going, and are probably Twittering and blogging the minutae of their paranoid lives from the back seat as they do. Ignore these people, and remember to smile for the CCTV.
4. On the tube, or in the street, keep walking. Briskly. There’s a Facebook group dedicated to Londoners’ fantasies about dealing with those who don’t.
5. No matter how much you earn, and no matter how much more you’re earning with your new London job, you will feel poor. Even Roman Abramovich was surprised at the cost of a loaf down Borough market, and left wondering if he’d taken enough out the hole in the wall for that and an artisan sausage sandwich with organic lemonade for lunch. Really. Or maybe not*. Console yourself with the fact you’re not having to scrape by on less than the London living wage, like one in seven of your new city neighbours. Or maybe you are, in which case, condolences. The government thinks you should survive on the flat-rate UK minimum, despite major banks, other big employers and even the new Tory mayor thinking Ken Livingstone’s higher London minimum is a good idea.
6. Helpfully – because you couldn’t afford a nice car anyway – having a banger with damaged paintwork is the pragmatist’s motor of choice around London. It means you can move into traffic without fear – that BMW/Mercedes/Audi driver will let you in**. It’s not that they’re being nice – they just don’t want to get bashed. Have you seen the insurance premiums?
7. Ah, yes – insurance premiums: for the love of God, shop around. Some insurance firms, landing you with an annual bill that’s one third of your car’s total value, seem convinced London’s full of people madly driving into one another. What? Oh.
8. Don’t buy a house with a basement.
9. Pocketing the money you’ve saved by not buying a house with a basement, save up, and do a really great restaurant. You’ve got an amazing choice, but the best meal I’ve had in London was probably at Rhodes Twenty Four, up the old NatWest tower; British food done really well, with stunning views of the city.
10. But the simple pleasures are good too. Nothing makes you feel like you’re in a great city more than watching the world go by with a late-night/small hours coffee at Bar Italia in Soho, or a greasy spoon breakfast in a formica topped-table caff a few hours later.
* The Abramovich thing is a lie. A flight of fancy, for illustrative purposes only. Sorry.
** This does not apply for London buses. Really. Don’t. Try. It.